I’ve been getting more requests for blankets lately. Before I respond to the requests, I want to have a serious think about the future of this project.
It has seemed that the Schuyler Blanket Project has been dying a slow death over the last couple of years. I think a lot of the blame is my own. I’ve been dealing with a lot over the last year or two and I’ve really dropped the ball here. I haven’t made a lot of noise over it, but my husband and I are divorcing. It’s been a long time coming and I think I’ve let other priorities slide as I’ve dealt with that. I’ve been very irresponsible about sending out packages, contacting sponsors, and keeping the blog and Facebook pages active. This is not the vision I had for this project and I apologize from the bottom of my heart.
When the original founders of this group and I first started off, we wanted to reach as many families as we could from as many places in the world as we could. We had hoped to have a very large number of people contributing to each blanket so that the parents would see how many people care about their loss. Losing a child is very isolating. Even almost four years later, there are days when I feel completely alone. I have been so fortunate to have a large support system to lean on when these days arrive. Not everyone is so lucky. Our blankets were meant to represent a big, warm hug from lots of people to show grieving parents that, while many people don’t understand their loss, their child will not be forgotten.
Our goal was never speed. The loss of a child lasts a lifetime. I lost my dad almost 20 years ago. I still miss him and I still think about him. However, I will honestly admit that it is not nearly so painful as having lost my daughter. I hope when she has been gone for 20 years, someone will still call me on her birthday and ask how I’m doing. Sometimes, those calls that comes weeks, months, and years later make a huge difference. This is why I was never concerned with churning out blankets quickly. I was always more focused on blanket being as personalized as possible. One of our members has made over a hundred squares for us! While her work is so very much appreciated, if all of the blankets were to be made exclusively with her squares, it would be clear that only one person was truly contributing.This goes against the vision for the group and is another reason why I am considering the end of the project. It just doesn’t feel as meaningful to me.
I do not want to see this project end. It has been such an important part of my own therapy and I have heard from several of the recipients of blankets. I know they greatly appreciate all of the hard work and love that went into them. Since you are all vital to the life of this project, I’d like your input. What happens now? We have several blankets still in the queue. I have a few requests that I have not responded to yet. I need to know what to tell them, but I cannot do it alone. Please take a moment to respond with any comments or suggestions you might have regarding the future of this project. Thank you.